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Heavenly Squirrels

One day Nicole Kidman, Jessica Simpson and Angelina Jolie, all past their prime, went on for a regular plastic surgery and beauty enhancement. Suddenly, the surgical clinic went on fire and all three of them died.

On the way to the gates of heaven and hell, they met St. Peter “Oh, hey dashing ladies,” greeted St. Peter. “As you see, it’s quite crowded here. But we only have one rule here if you don’t want to get punished for eternity, do not step into those heavenly squirrels,” instructed St. Peter.

All around them are swamped with heavenly squirrels. It’s so hard to avoid them that Nicole Kidman was the first one to step on a squirrel.

St. Peter immediately appeared and told Nicole Kidman, “Your punishment will be to be chained with the ugliest man you have ever seen in your life.”

And a stinking and grizzly man appeared chaining the screaming woman while he took her away.

Seeing what has happened, Jessica Simpson was so careful about scampering around the vicinity. But while sitting in a bench, her foot stepped on a squirrel. St. Peter appeared and punished her by being chain to the ugliest man in the kingdom. Once again the woman was crying and screaming while she was dragged by a smelly and disgusting man.

Angelina Jolie was most careful this time seeing those two friends go miserably. But when she tried to drink in the fountain, she accidentally stepped on a squirrel.

St. Peter appeared, “Well, here is your punishment!”

To Angelina’s surprise, a hunk appeared in front of her, with rippling muscle, kissable lips, comely eyes and dark wavy hair. He immediately chained himself to her.

Angelina was confused asked him, “I don’t understand, what did I do to be chained to a handsome guy like you forever?”

The guy answered, “How the hell I know what you did? But what I know is that I stepped on a squirrel!”


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