Event Jokes

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Crash landing

Flight Stewardess Announcing… Stewardess: You are now boarding flight 911 – ilang sandali po lamang at tayo ay lalapag na sabundok na walang paliparan. Passengers:

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Prusisyon

Pari: Ok. Ang mga lalaki, sa karo ni San Jose sumunod. At ang mga babae, sa karo ni Santa Maria. Mga Bakla: Ay, kami father

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Masarap na pulutan

Isang araw, may isang lasenggero na nagyaya sa kanyang kumpare na makipaginuman sa isang handaan… Lasinggero: Pare sama ka sa akin sa handaan, may inuman!

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Sayawan

May poging lumapit sa isang babaing nakaupo sa gilid… Pogi: Hi miss, tanong ko lang. Sasayaw ka ba? Miss: (Super kilig, sabay tayo). Yup, oo

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Rosaryo

Sa isang barko… Kapitan: Lulubog ang barko! Sino sa inyo ang marunong mag rosaryo? Juan: Ako ho kap. Kapitan: Sige Juan simulan mo na. Kasi

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Ticket

Juan at Pedro nag-uusap… Pedro: Badtrip pre! Nanuod ako ng sine kanina, ubos yung isan libo ko. Juan: Ha! Bakit?! Pedro: Bili ako ng bili

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Tuwing Kasal

Tuwing may kasal tinutukso ako ng aking lola… Ooyyy, sya na susunod! Tumigil lang sya nung minsan may pinuntahan kaming libing… Ooyyy, sya na susunod!

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Pedro at Hudas

Jesus: Ikaw Pedro, itatatwa mo ako ng tatlong beses pagkatapus tumilaok ng manok. At ikaw nman Hudas… Hoy Hudas, makinig ka! Wag kang basa ng

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Bisaya killer

One day, a bisaya killer meets 3 women along the way…   Killer: Hoy, ikaw. Bisaya ka noh? Woman 1: Hende bah!   Bang!  

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Kindergarten

In a kindergarten class, a little girl asked… Girl: Mam, do 40 years old get pregnant? Teacher: Yes! Girl: How about 20? Teacher: Yes! Girl:

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Sa loob ng church

Kakaiba na talaga mga tao ngayon. Akalain mo ba naman… Nasa loob ako ng church kanina, at biglang in the middle of the Mass, biglang

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Son: Mom, I’m going to the moon someday!
Mom: Nah, son! NASA has already stopped sending monkeys to the moon!